The Cost of Concealment

The Cost of Concealment

Understanding the Idolatry of Image

Personal reflections from a fellow traveler.  Not AA approved literature.  Shared in the spirit of Experience, Strength, and Hope.

What will they think?  It’s no one’s business. I don’t owe anyone anything. 

Admittedly, all these thoughts have crossed my mind at one point or another when faced with cleaning up the wreckage of my past.  Each one offered a reasonable argument for remaining hidden.  Concealment appeared to protect what little dignity I had left.  Beneath that defense was something deeper: I was not just protecting my story; I was guarding my image.

I had become more concerned about how I appeared than who I was becoming.

Here’s the danger: anything I am unwilling to surrender, even the approval of others or the perception of my image, can quietly become an Idol.

An Idol is something I obey, protect, and sacrifice for.  I sacrifice integrity for image when appearance becomes more important than honesty and healing.  Over time this becomes costly.  Someday the bill comes due, with interest.

The cost of honesty may be discomfort or embarrassment. The cost of concealment is often greater. It costs peace. It costs connection. It keeps me devoted to a false version of myself while the person I was created to become remains hidden beneath it.

I will be humbled by what is exposed, but concealment will continue to control me as its prisoner if I refuse to step into the light.

What must be illuminated so I can be free from the bondage of self?